July 7, 2012

• Day 18

  Day 01- A picture of yourself with fifteen facts.
  Day 02 - A picture of you and the person you have been close with the longest.
  Day 03 - A picture of the cast from your favorite show.
  Day 04 - A picture of a habit you wish you didn't have..........
  Day 05 - A picture of your favourite memory.
  Day 06 - A picture of a person you'd love to trade places with for a day.
  Day 07 - A picture of your most treasured item.
  Day 08 - A picture that makes you laugh.
  Day 09 - A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most.
  Day 10 - A picture of the person you do the most messed up things with.
  Day 11 - A picture of something you hate.
  Day 12 - A picture of something you love.
  Day 13 - A picture of your favorite band or artist.
  Day 14 - A picture of someone you could never imagine your life without.
  Day 15 - A picture of something you want to do before you die.
  Day 16 - A picture of someone who inspires you.
  Day 17 - A picture of something that has made a huge impact on your life recently.
  Day 18 - A picture of your biggest insecurity.
  Day 19 - A picture of you when you were little.
  Day 20 - A picture of somewhere you'd love to travel.
  Day 21 - A picture of something you wish you could forget.
  Day 22 - A picture of something you wish you were better at.
  Day 23 - A picture of your favorite book.
  Day 24 - A picture of something you wish you could change.
  Day 25 - A picture of your day.
  Day 26 - A picture of something that means a lot to you.
  Day 27 - A picture of yourself and a family member.
  Day 28 - A picture of something you're afraid of.
  Day 29 - A picture that can always make you smile.
  Day 30 - A picture of someone you miss.

  Pills
  

  

  This thirty-day thing is starting to get more and more uncomfortable, but here we go. My name is Amanda. I'm nineteen years old. I take pills. Every morning, every night, I take pills. No one knows. No one needs to know, but I take them. Everything is prescribed by my doctor (not my daddy), and I take them. There is one pill in particular, Zanaflex (not to be confused with Xanax), that I abuse pretty bad.

  Zanaflex, or Tizanidine, is used to relieve the spasms and increased muscle tone caused by multiple sclerosis (MS, a disease in which the nerves do not function properly and patients may experience weakness, numbness, loss of muscle coordination and problems with vision, speech, and bladder control), stroke, or brain or spinal injury. Tizanidine is in a class of medications called skeletal muscle relaxants. It works by slowing action in the brain and nervous system to allow the muscles to relax. Go here for more information about this specific medication. I only take this medication at night, because I can't sleep without it. My doctor (and my daddy) have both, separately, acknowledged that I have a mild physical addition.

  I also take Vyvanse. Yes, that's right. Vyvanse. No, you can't have any. That's illegal. Vyvanse is used as part of a treatment program to control symptoms of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD; more difficulty focusing, controlling actions, and remaining still or quiet than other people who are the same age) in adults and children. Vyvanse is in a class of medications called central nervous system stimulants. It works by changing the amounts of certain natural substances in the brain. Go here for more about this medicine. Vyvanse is habit forming, but so far I've never abused it - and I never want to. I have no appetite when I'm on. I'm mean, irritable, and have to be doing something. Have to be doing something. It's like a compulsion to occupy myself. I hate it, but I take it. I don't have a choice.

  I'm on several other pills, but the two I mention are the two I hate. Really, one day I just want to know what it's like to wake up and not have to pop open a pill bottle. I want to be able to close my eyes and have them stay that way till morning. This is my biggest insecurity. Pills.

  • 11:37 pm
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